Hoy Hoy!!
Greeting from Casa dos Gatos! Gonna get this one up fast for the benefit of all the Crabheads© that will be in attendance Friday night in Hoagburgh.
Giganamous crowd at the Folkiedome this evening for the first week of the new format. If you haven’t heard, in an attempt to make the friendly (but tight) confines more maneuverable for the staff and to allow the patrons to get their food and drink orders more easily, we’ve gone to a random draw for Crab Choosing®. It went very well and the defending champs even managed a podium. I think there may be a tweak or two before the next races on the 24th, but overall I think it was a winner.
That’s enough chit-chat, let’s get right to the results-
Crab Racing USA-
PreRace:
Some of this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this, and this.
Rules To Live With And Abide By
Trivia Answers:
1) Raindrops Keep falling On My Head
2) Orange
3) Peter Pan
4) Hawaii
5) John Wayne
National Anthem (fourth verse)
Flag Holder- Terri
They’re Off and They’re Haulin’ Shell
Preliminaries:
First Half:
1) Winner- #55 Find ‘Em, Feel ‘Em, Fuq ‘Em, and Forget ‘Em- Crabby Old Pharts (COF)
Starting Lineup
2) Winner- #72 Fireball- The Wolf Pack (WP)
3) Winner- #77 Itchy And Scratchy- Sapphire Racing League (SRL)
4) Winner- #26 Thanx. Now Wipe That Shit Off Your Face And Get Me A Beer- COF
5) Winner- #35 Abe Froman. Sausage King Of Chicago- COF
6) Winner- Super Folkie- Facial Shot Racing (FSR) via Halftime Charity Raffle
7) Winner- #14 Out Of Thousands Of Sperms, Yours Was The Fastest- We May Not Finish But At Least We Came Racing (RPR)
8) Winner- #48Gold- Old Strippers Don’t Retire, They Just Get The Crabs- COF
Halftime:
Some of this
Second Half (Right back at ya):
9) Winner- #44 My Crabs Spread Faster Than These- Dumber Than A Bag Of Dicks Racing (DBD)
Halftime Entries:
#84 and Super Folkie in a Halftime Raffle
10) Winner- #60 Lick ‘Em Quick- Sand Fleas Racing (SFR)
11) Winner- #84 Shit For Brains- Blue Crabs Racing (BCR) via Halftime Charity Raffle
The Wave
12) Winner- #0 Crab Ass- Michigan Crabbys (MCR)
13) Winner- #3 I Didn’t Have The Crabs Until My Wife Cheated On Me- RPR
14) Winner- #46 Kurt Cobain’s Favorite Shotgun- Crustacean Sensations (CS)
15) Winner- #48Orange Oh Really? Well Put It Back In So I Can Finish- FSR
16) Winner- #1 Numb Nuts- BCR
Goodbye Losers:
Semifinals:
1) Winner- #3 I Didn’t Have The Crabs Until My Wife Cheated On Me- We May Not Finish But At Least We Came Racing
2) Winner- #72 Fireball- The Wolf Pack
3) Winner- #84 Shit For Brains- Blue Crabs Racing
4) Winner- #26 Thanx. Now Wipe That Shit Off Your Face And Get Me A Beer- Crabby Old Pharts
Finals
Order of Merit:
Fourth Place- A Hearty Wave And A Well Done- #72 Fireball- The Wolf Pack
Third Place- A High Quality Tee Shirt – #3 I Didn’t Have The Crabs Until My Wife Cheated On Me- We May Not Finish But At Least We Came Racing
Second Place- $20 in Folkie’s Krab Kash (the next best thing to free)- #26 Thanx. Now Wipe That Shit Off Your Face And Get Me A Beer- Crabby Old Pharts
First Place- $30 in Folkie’s Krab Kash (ditto)- #84 Shit For Brains- Blue Crabs Racing
Time:
Plus Three
We held out Super Crab and #84 for a halftime raffle to raise money for a family who’s having a tough go and lo and behold, #84 takes it all. Imagine that. You may see the Number One Crab held out in the future for more charity raffles. We’ll have to see.
The Crabs will be back in THREE weeks on March 24th. Until then, his name’s Sonny Starr!
ciao for nao
djjj