Hoy Hoy-
Greetings from the Casa dos Gatos. Well it’s Tax Day. Time to settle up with the Treasury in Kansas City. Didn’t get hit as hard this year, so it’s not so bad. The middle of April also means the end of the Spring Season for Chainsaw Sisters Racing, as Whita Sita heads back to the Sisters’ North Base in Kosciusko County. Time for another summer of Lost Gilligans, Lost Bradys, and the ever popular Triple A G. See you around Thanksgiving.
In the words of Johnny Nash, I can see clearly now, the rain is gone. At least for a couple of days. The clouds break and the sun comes out on a decent crowd on a Wednesday night in Mayberry. Sixty bucks on the line tonight, as Super Folkie brings the First Place money from the last race back. An inordinate number of lovely young women with questionable judgment (would they be at the races otherwise?) in the audience. We love it when that happens. Sapphire Racing dominates the Table, with the Pharts and Chainsaw Sisters filling in the cracks, so to speak. We’re also joined by the Defending Champions, Facial Shot Racing, The Fockers, as well as a Hincky or two. The Bar is filled up nicely and we get an Unnatural Sellout.
The usual suspects are with us. Your host Steve Schrader, Ricky The Four Inch Wonder© behind the bar. Thursday Night Shane is in the Kitchen and Rhonda’s on the floor, SERVING US ALL!!!!!. The labels on the Table and the Red Stripe on the DJ Deck can only mean one thing, it’s time for-
Beers of the World Crab Racing
PreRace:
Rules To Live With And Abide By
Trivia Answers:
1) WC Fields
2) Wendy
3) Open Sesame
4) Pigeon Sisters
5) Sweet Georgia Brown
National Anthem (fourth verse)
Flag Holder- No. Thank You!
They’re Off and They’re Haulin’ Shell
Preliminaries:
First Half:
1) Winner- #50 Lawman’s Lady- Facial Shot Racing (FSR)
Starting Lineup
2) Winner- #51 What Happens In The Aquarium, STAYS IN THE AQUARIUM!!!- Chainsaw Sisters Racing (CSR)
3) Winner- #4 Muffin- Sapphire Racing League (SRL)
4) Winner- #17 Oliver Twist. Because I Love Good Dickens- Crabby Old Pharts (COF)
5) Winner- #0 Sapphire Sisters- SRL
6) Winner- #95 Holly Golightly- Folkie’s Fockers (FF)
7) Winner- #74 Oriental Lickmaster Tongue Ninja- CSR
8) Winner- #40 Suzie Q- SRL
Halftime:
Some of this.
Second Half (Right back at ya):
9) Winner- #1 Pimp Daddy- FSR
Halftime Entries:
Not Tonight
10) Winner- #46 Nashty- FSR
11) Winner- #22 Roy- SRL
The Wave
12) Winner- #26 Mamma Me Lavitica (I’m really looking for help on this one)- Heather
13) Winner- #88 Ting Ting- SRL
14) Winner- #55 Greybeard The Pirate. Blow Me Now, Er Down- COF
15) Winner- #71 Crabby Old Sharts- SRL
16) Winner- Super Folkie
Goodbye Losers:
Semifinals:
1) Winner- #88 Ting Ting- Sapphire Racing League
2) Winner- #95 Holly Golightly- Folkie’s Fockers
3) Winner- #22 Roy- Sapphire Racing League
4) Winner- #17 Oliver Twist. Because I Love Good Dickens- Crabby Old Pharts
Outstanding Individuals:
Your Host- Steve Schrader
Behind The Bar- Rick
In The Kitchen- Shane
On The Floor, SERVING US ALL!!!- Rhonda
Finals
Order of Merit:
Fourth Place- Hearty Wave and A Well Done- #17 Oliver Twist. Because I Love Good Dickens- Crabby Old Pharts
Third Place- A High Quality Tee Shirt- #88 Ting Ting- Sapphire Racing League
Second Place- $20 in Folkie’s Bucks (the next best thing to free)- #22 Roy- Sapphire Racing League
First Place- $30 in Folkie’s Bucks (ditto)- #95 Holly Golightly- Folkie’s Fockers
Time:
Minus Five
Sonny brings a touch of The Crud® with him tonite, but the Trooper that he is, puts in a stellar effort. A historic night as the Original Sarah not only makes the Finals, but takes First Place to boot. SRL covers both Second and Third to move back in front in The Standings, with Crabby Old Pharts taking the Fourth Place point. Super Folkie gets leaned in on in the Fourth Semifinal, otherwise he might have defended his win. But never fear, the Fockers put their prize back in the Kitty, so we’ll be Racing for $90 on the 29th. Talk about stimulus. Huzzah!!
It appears that I’ve run out of Pinot Grigio, so I’ll put this one to bed. As I said, we’ll be back on the 29th with a Board that’s yet to be determined. As always, pick ‘em at seven thirty, race ‘em at eight. Until then, he’s Sonny Starr.
Ciao for nao
j