Hoy Hoy!!
Greetings from Casa dos Gatos. Welcome back to the hustle and bustle. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to spend the Winter at the North Compound. Peaceful. Relaxing. Hopefully there’d be none of this. But you might be able to get some work done. Been on a gipsy kick lately, ever since I found this, so I’ll sprinkle a little here and there.
Big crowd turns out for the Crabs tonite. Facial Shot, The Hinckys, The Pharts, and The Fockers are among the regulars in attendance. The Crustacean Sensations are back along with what looks something like the Goondock Saints, but is running under the Team Sapphire banner. Chainsaw Sisters are in full force. Not only are the Founders back for another season, they’re joined tonite by some out-of-town talent. Ms Clean is in from Tipton for her first Crab go-round and NTH (some of his latest work is here) is in from Obama City with his incredibly charming friend Jessica. Good to see all of you.
All fifty states are on the board. Steve Schrader is your gracious host. Ricky Four Inch is behind the bar and Thursday Night Shane is in the kitchen. Rhonda’s on the floor, SERVING US ALL and all you Socialists better have yer Fackin’ Flag Pins (FFP), because it’s time for-
Crab Racing USA-
PreRace:
Rules To Live With And Abide By
Trivia Answers:
1) Juneau- Jagermeister Lanyard (LL)
2) Alaska- Hat (HAT)
3) Oregon- Mardi Gras Beads (MGB)
4) Colorado- Koozie (KZ)
5) New York- Power Pal Magic Jar Opener (MG)
National Anthem (fourth verse)
Flag Holder- Ashley
They’re Off and They’re Haulin’ Shell
Preliminaries:
First Half:
1) Winner- #34 I’m Throwing A Party Between My Legs. Wanna Come?- Facial Shot Racing (FSR)- MGB
Starting Lineup
2) Winner- #46 Ouch Ouch! You’re On My Hair- Team PW- Keychain (KC)
3) Winner- #28 Lick MY NUTS!!!- FSR- Tee Shirt (TS)
4) Winner- #6 Facks Like A Champ- FSR- LL
5) Winner- #76 My Crabs Spread Faster Than These- Team Hincky (TH)- Snickers Bar
6) Winner- #51 She Hopped On Her Menstrual Cycle And Runned Me The Hell Over- Crabby Old Pharts (COF)- Flashing Jagermeister Shark (FJS)
7) Winner- #42 Dirty Corksacker- Team Sapphire- KC
8) Winner- #0 Cream Of Sum Yung Guy- Shane- The Movie
Halftime:
Some of this (great song. not so much the video). As well as this
Second Half (Right back at ya):
9) Winner- #82 Cont IV- Casey (She didn’t name her Crab)- Key Chain Slash Bottle Opener (K/B)
Halftime Entries:
A few
10) Winner- #?? My Precious- Kelli- Key Chain Slash Multi Tool- (K/M)
11) Winner- #22 Twitch Racing- FSR- Orange Condom (OC)
The Wave
12) Winner- #50 Cont- Ashley (She named Casey’s Crab)- KC
13) Winner- #42 A Christmas Carol. I Love Good Dickens- COF- LL
14) Winner- #87 I Thought I Had A Case Of The Crabs, But I Only Counted Twenty-Three- COF- KC
15) Winner- #5 I’m Only Four Inches, But Some Girls Like It That Thick- FF- MGB
16) Winner- #15 Mama- SR- MGB
Goodbye Losers:
Semifinals:
1) Winner- #34 I’m Throwing A Party Between My Legs. Wanna Come?- Facial Shot Racing
2) Winner- #87 I Thought I Had A Case Of The Crabs, But I Only Counted Twenty-Three- Crabby Old Pharts
3) Winner- #28 Lick MY NUTS!!!- Facial Shot Racing
4) Winner- #50 Cont- Ashley
Finals
Order of Merit:
Fourth Place- #87 I Thought I Had A Case Of The Crabs, But I Only Counted Twenty-Three- Crabby Old Pharts
Third Place- T-Shirt- #50 Cont- Ashley
Second Place- $20- #28 Lick MY NUTS!!!- Facial Shot Racing
First Place- $30- #34 I’m Throwing A Party Between My Legs. Wanna Come?- Facial Shot Racing
Time:
Minus Three
Facial Shot announces their presence with authority, scoring a Corvette One-Two finish. That puts the Shotters in first by a serious eight point margin. The Luck Of The Flagholder grabs Third and the Crabby Old Pharts snatch the last point to stay in the Title hunt going into the last week of the year.
As I said before, it was great to see Nic and Jessica, as well as Paula and the rest of the crowd. One more race in 2008. It’ll be on December 10th at the regular time. Here’s one more from those crazy Gypsies and we’ll see you then!
ciao for nao
djjj