Chimichanga Cheesy Burrito!
Greetings form Casa dos Gatos. A beautiful evening for the Racing type Crabs at Folkie’s. A medium to decent crowd. A Lite Goondock Representation (LGR) on the far side of the board, with Tina and Carrie leading a very enthusiastic crew right behind them. The Good Sisters and the Fockers join forces in a once in a century occurrence to compete as the Classic Cubs. The Crabby Old Farts are in the Field Level Boxes to my left and Facial Shot Racing has a nice mob in the Bleachers back toward the window. Steve’s calling the balls and strikes (mostly balls it appears). Ricky Four Inch is back from his thing and standing fast behind the bar. Thursday Night Shane is in the kitchen and ready to race. And Rhonda’s on the floor, SERVING US ALL!!! If only we’d have gotten to hear Harry say Fukodome. Just once. Since we can’t have that, how’s about-
Baseball Crab Racing-
PreRace:
Rules To Live With And Abide By
Trivia Answers:
1) Chicago Cubs- Potted Meat (PM)
2) Washington Senators- Power Pal Magic Jar Opener (MG)
3) Leo Durocher- PM
4) Gil Hodges- MG
5) Nine to nothing- PM
National Anthem (fourth verse)
Flag Holder- Andrea
They’re Off and They’re Haulin’ Shell
Preliminaries:
First Half:
1) Winner- #51 LICK MY NUTS!!!- Facial Shot Racing (FSR)- Chocolate Bunny (CB)
Starting Lineup
2) Winner- #7 Harry Paratesticals- Joan- Flashing Jagermeister Button (FJB)
3) Winner- #9 Ferguson Jenkins- Classic Cubs (CC)- Mardi Gras Beads (MGB)
4) Winner- #12 Jose Crabinal- CC- Hat (HAT)
5) Winner- #65 Crusty Cub- John- Koozie
6) Winner- Super Folkie- The House Crab- Receives No Prize
7) Winner- #85 Wilma Fingerdieux- Crabby Old Farts (COF)- Multi Tool (MT)
8) Winner- #69 Facks Like A Champ- FSR- MGB
Halftime:
Some of this.
Second Half (Right back at ya):
9) Winner- #8 Fank The Yuckees- CC- MGB
Halftime Entries:
Yep
10) Winner- #2 Headin’ Home After Workin’ The Dugout- Twisted Fister Racing (TFR)- Koozie
11) Winner- #75 Ron Cey- CC- CB
The Wave
12) Winner- #27 Slow Pitchin’ With A Big Bat- TFR- FJB
13) Winner- #44 Lawman’s Lady- FSR- MG
14) Winner- #38 Pudgy Prick- Tom- CB
15) Winner- #26 Is It Possible For A Crab To Get Humans?- CC- Koozie
16) Winner- #000 Muff Diver- Goondock Saints Racing (GSR)
Goodbye Losers:
Semifinals:
1) Winner- #51 LICK MY NUTS!!!- Facial Shot Racing
2) Winner- #2 Headin’ Home After Workin’ The Dugout- Twisted Fister Racing
3) Winner- #85 Wilma Fingerdieux- Crabby Old Farts
4) Winner- #69 Facks Like A Champ- Facial Shot Racing
Finals
Order of Merit:
Fourth Place- Hearty Wave and A Well Done (Plus a copy of the Crab Racing Documentary- “The Night The Lights Went Out At Folkie’s”)- #85 Wilma Fingerdieux- Crabby Old Farts
Third Place- A Top Quality Tee Shirt- #2 Headin’ Home After Workin’ The Dugout- Twisted Fister Racing
Second Place- $20 Worth of Folkie’s Bucks (“The next best thing to free”)- #69 Facks Like A Champ- Facial Shot Racing
First Place- $30 Worth of Folkie’s Bucks (“Ditto”)- #51 LICK MY NUTS!!!- Facial Shot Racing
Time:
Minus Four
Facial Shot storms to an impressive One-Two finish with a Mythical Corvette just to rub it in. The Fisters take Third and TN Shane walks away with the movie. Ironically, the Classic Cubs appeared to have been shut out. That’s okay, it’s a long season and you wouldn’t want to use it all up in April.
The Crabs return to The Friendly Confines on April the Sixteenth on a board that is yet to be determined. If I hear anything, you’ll be the first to know. Until then, he’s Sonny Starr.
Ciao for nao
j