Football Crab Racing

Hoy Hoy!! Greetings from Casa Dos Gatos!

If a duck flew upside down, a hammer would still break a window.
-Steve *****

Kind of a Zen koan thingy from a guy that was raised a Quaker. But come to think of it, so was I. Anyway, it’s #63 in our “Great Quotes From South Marion” series, that one courtesy of South Marion Friends Church.

What a week at the track. Last show of the year. Football Crab Racing. Great crowd, but best of all- the return of the Sharlows to Race Row. I’ve been trying to figure out how long it’s been, you can help me out, but I’m thinking ten years since Chainsaw Sisters raced five strong. Not only that, but they think they might have a copy of the oft-rumored, rarely seen 1993 classic “Chainsaw Sisters Night at the Races” (also known as “The Night The Lights Went Out At Folkies”)! We’ll have to schedule a viewing.

As I said, great crowd. Not only Scott and Sheri, but Kylie was there, my own #1 kid, freshly turned 21. Unfortunately, she raced for those fokking Fokkers. Oh well, kids will be kids. I apologize in advance for the info in this issue. It seems that if I don’t get this thing written on Thursday, it’s Monday before I can get back to it. And with the holidays, now it’s Tuesday. So some of the stuff below may not be completely accurate, and some of the names may not be exactly right. It appears that my notes were written in a time-based code that becomes more cryptic with each passing day. Or maybe it’s the seventies catching up with me. We’ll never know. Steve at the helm, Rick behind the bar, Nelia in the kitchen, Rhonda on the floor, and Chainsaw Sisters racing five! Let’s race crabs-

Football Crab Racing

116-105

Trivia Answers:
1) George Blanda- 2007 Calendar
2) Strangers In The Night- 2007 Calendar
3) Romulus & Remus- 2007 Calendar
4) Ra- 2007 Calendar
5) King Arthur- 2007 Calendar

National Anthem (fourth verse)
Flagholder- #7 I Pick Up Men At The Crab Races And Marry Them (IPUMAMT)- Sheri (Chainsaw Sisters Racing) NO! THANK YOU!!!

They’re Off and They’re Haulin’ Shell

Intro:

Preliminaries

First Half:
1) Winner- #13 P*ssy-whipped- Robin- 2007 Calendar

Starting Lineup

117-119

2) Winner- #85 Big Daddy- Folkies Fokkers (FF)- 2007 Calendar
3) Winner- #11 Man Whore- Mike- 2007 Calendar
4) Winner- #49 Auggie- Brenda- 2007 Calendar
5) Winner- #30 Be A Man. Pump It Dry. No Spit.- Jim- 2007 Calendar
6) Winner- #?? Pay No Attention To The Man Behind The Curtain- Chainsaw Sisters Racing (CSR)- 2007 Calendar
7) Winner- #74 Pee Wee- Sheryl- 2007 Calendar
8) Winner- #76 Gerald Ford- Tony- 2007 Calendar

Halftime:

Second Half:
9) Winner- #66 Less You, More Me- Leslie- 2007 Calendar

Halftime Entries:
#28 I Bet My Baby’s Support Check On FSU Minus Three- FF

10) Winner- #7 IPUMAMT- CSR- 2007 Calendar
11) Winner- #21 Sock Cucker- Sheila- 2007 Calendar
12) Winner- #61 What Happens In The Aquarium, STAYS IN THE AQUARIUM!!! (WHITA,SITA)- CSR- 2007 Calendar
13) Winner- #33 I’m A Hard Habit To Break- FF- 2007 Calendar
14) Winner- #97 Lightning Loser- Tony- 2007 Calendar
15) Winner- #59 Big Dick Carl- Patti- 2007 Calendar
16) Winner- #3 Pete (wwweeeeeee tttthhoooouuuggghttt yyyyyoooouuuu wwwwuuuuzzzz uuuuuhhhhh ttttoooooaaaaadddd)- John- 2007 Calendar

Goodbye Losers:

Semifinals:
1) Winner- #33 I’m A Hard Habit To Break- FF
2) Winner- #85 Big Daddy- FF
3) Winner- #21 Sock Cucker- Sheila (Lottery Pick- #4 Omokok- Carol)
4) Winner- #61 WHITA,SITA- CSR (Lottery Pick-#8 Just A Mouthful- Carol)

Finals

Time:
Plus Five!!!


Order of Merit:
Fourth Place- Hearty Wave and A Well Done (HW&AWD)- #85 Big Daddy- Folkies Fokkers
Third Place- T-Shirt- #33 I’m A Hard Habit To Break- Folkies Fokkers
Second Place- $20- #21 Sock Cucker- Sheila
First Place- $30- #What Happens In The Aquarium, Stays In The Aquarium- Chainsaw Sisters Racing

Well there you have it. If you count the Willie Race (and I don’t know why you wouldn’t) CSR is two for four since their return. Way to go bro. That second half had pretty much everything in it except “The Mandatory Sing-a-long” in it. I’m pretty certain that we’ve never gone over 90 minutes since I’ve been the DJ. I’m sure they might have gone over when Scooter and Cowboy Jack Kelly were playing the music and Chainsaw Sisters raced five strong every week. But I wasn’t paying attention back then. Oh well A great crowd with great energy for the last show of the year.

It looks like things may slow down here at the compound now that the holidays are over. Plenty of movies to watch, I’ll get with you soon and see you tonight. Because, “If it’s Wednesday, it’s wacing”.

Ciao for nao
j

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