Hoy Hoy!! Greetings from Casa Dos Gatos!
How’s things? I trust all went well in Fairmount last weekend. I see you guys added another photo caption (link expires in seven days) to your collection. I’m not sure what to make of that. On the one hand, it’s good, as the true measure of any bar band is “can you get them on the dance floor” and pictures of people dancing to the Dorothys is a great advertisement for that. On the other hand, maybe you guys just aren’t very photogenic. And really, it didn’t pan out so bad for Becker and Fagen. Either way, a picture of people dancing is good. Win win I guess, everybody’s happy.
I was running behind getting there and was welcomed with a warm chorus of “there he ises” (what is the plural of is?). Listened to the soundtrack from “Pulp Fiction” on the way over. You just can’t argue with Tarantino’s taste. All his movies have great music. Chingon, from Kill Bill 2 (which was on back to back with KB1 this past weekend on TNT. “My name is Buck and I’m here to party?”). Jackie Brown had Bill Withers, Brothers Johnson, and the Meters. Even Zamfir and his Pan Flute in KB1 was perfect. True genius.
The crowd this week played bigger than it actually was I think. Karma came around for Facial Shot Racing after last week’s irregularities. Although they implemented the Powell Doctrine on karma a little bit. They had at least seven players and maybe as many as ten. So they certainly deployed a large enough force to get the job done, as you’ll see. I did forward your inquiry on the “do overs” and Sonny asked that I point out to you Special Rule Number 14, regarding statutes of limitations (also commonly referred to as the “tough titties” rule).
Race row was full. Holly was in your seat, next to her was her mother Shirley, then Dr Carl, Mark, Heather, Matt, Robb, Sheryl, Long Arm Mike, Jim, and Brenda. Three in the skyboxes and a table of non-players by the jukebox. “Winner Winner Chicken Dinner” Josh snuck in during the proceedings. Haven’t seen him in a looooong time. Craig and the Original Sarah were at the bar with Steve, Rick was on the other side. Nelia was in the kitchen, and Rhonda was on the floor. Me? I was Blinded By The Light. But right before that, this is what I saw-
Superhero Crab Racing
PreRace:
Trivia Answers:
1) Rome- Koozie
2) Edison- Chip Clip
3) Seven- Hat
4) Eight- Clapper
5) Nine– Ramen Noodles
National Anthem (fourth verse)
Flagholder- Shirley- #75 My Panties Have Convenience Openings
Intro:
Preliminaries
First Half:
1) Winner- #84 This Chocolate Pudding TASTES LIKE SH*T- Facial Shot Racing (FSR)- M&Ms
2) Winner- #Just Suck It Once and I Promise I Won’t Call You a C*cksucker Jim- Clock
3) Winner- #29 LICK MY NUTS!!!- FSR- Flyswatter
4) Winner- #55 He Said F*ck Me Silly, So I Put On A Clown Suit- FSR- M&Ms
5) TWinner- #7 Dammit Jim- Brenda- Lanyard
6) Winner- #89 Stop Battering Women. Eat Them Raw- FSR- Ramen Noodles
7) Winner- #14 I Got Circumcised and Lost Five Pounds- Matt- Pen
8) Winner- #61 F*cks Like A Champ- FSR- Pen
Halftime:
Second Half:
9) Winner- #75 There’s A Party Between My Legs, Wanna Come? (TAPBML,WC?)- FSR- Pen
105-112
Halftime Entries:
#20 The Three Things Men Want- Folkies Fokkers
#25 Food- FF
#31 Silence- FF
#45 Sex- FF
(I may have f*cked that up)
10) Winner- #95 The Shocker. Yadda Yadda Yadda- FSR- M&Ms
11) Winner- #90 Divorce. Bend Over And Take It Like A Man- FSR- M&Ms
12) Winner- #3 Twisted Steel and Sex Appeal- Rob- Keychain
13) Winner- # 75 My Underwear Has Convenience Openings- Shirley (Flagholder)- Pen
14) Winner- #36 I’m Only Four Inches, But Some Girls Like It That Thick- FF- M&Ms
15) Winner- #69 She Told Me She Wasn’t Married, THAT LYIN’ BITCH!!!- FF- Pen
16) Winner- #4 Best Lawyer- FSR- M&Ms
Goodbye Losers:
All Disco Semifinals:
1) Winner- #76 There’s A Party Between My Legs, Wanna Come?- Facial Shot Racing
2) Winner- #89 Stop Battering Women. Eat Them Raw- FSR
3) Winner- #14 I Got Circumcised and Lost Five Pounds- Matt
4) Winner- #4 Best Lawyer- FSR
Finals
Time:
Minus six
Order of Merit:
Fourth Place- HW&AWD – #89 Stop Battering Women. Eat Them Raw- Facial Shot Racing
Third Place- T-Shirt- #14 I Got Circumcised and Lost Five Pounds- Matt
Second Place- $20- #4 Best Lawyer- Facial Shot Racing
First Place- $30- #76 There’s A Party Between My Legs, Wanna Come?- Facial Shot Racing
Like I said, a strong night for FSR. They got nine of sixteen races, they got three of four semis, and had two crabs in each semi. I’m not certain I’ve ever seen anything like that before. How about you? Other anomalies- Sequential answers in trivia (oh yeah, we now have the **************** during trivia) and Disco semifinals for the second straight week. Sonny had the crud, and the we might have had to call the Paramedics during the Roman numeral portion of the Bob and Tom semis. So Disco it was.
Keep in touch and I’ll see you next time.
In the words of Madeline Kahn– “If it’s Wednesday, it’s wacing.
ciao
j